We're knee deep in white fluffy stuff at the moment. And I've
been dreaming of owning a pair of snowshoes.

 Now, guess what? My mother-in-law just bought me a pair for

Christmas. And she says I can unwrap them now!

Jules is also getting a pair but he has to wait for 'The Big Day'.

Don't tell him about this unfair 'deal'. He'll be furious! 

 

So what's cloud hopping? This is an image conjured up in my head

last winter by a friend who spent a few days 'hopping' over the

Alps.

 

 I've always wanted to cloud hop, ever since I was a kid lying

on my back in the dusty veldt, staring up at the huge

cumulonimbus one gets in Africa. (This dream got shredded the

first time I flew through a cloud, now I can have it back at

last!)

 

 Please don't tell me I'm supposed to walk in these things, not

hop or fly. It's just not true. Yesterday I walked all the way

to the top of a snowy hill and then hopped and skidded (nearly

rolled and flew) all the way down. The only real danger?

Tripping over your own feet.

 

Oh dear! Jules has just told me he doesn't want a pair of

snowshoes for Christmas!

Looks like there'll be a spare pair hanging around here this

winter. Come play!

 

Cartwheel update? I have to confess I opted out temporarily. I'm

waiting for waist deep snow before practising again. Maybe I'll

invent a new sport this winter.

Cloud wheeling?? Wheee...

 

So, wherever you are in the world,

keep your head in the clouds,

 (and remember the golden rule of cloud hopping:

you're definitely flying too low!)

 

And if you live anywhere near Switzerland, come play with me in

the country.

http://ww.handnalysisonline.com/adayinthecountry.php

golden rule # 2. It's never too late to have a happy childhood!

 

My 9 year old son has just started his

  first business venture with a great new invention called

a Reality Zapper.

It works like a TV remote control, but for whatever drama is going on in your life

right now.

I'm his best client at the moment.

 You just point them at whatever you want to change and then

squeeze the button. Works like a charm every time!

; )

 

Btw, they work particularly well on grumpy husbands! And

also on mothers! Jules pointed one at me and next thing

I was caught up in a half hour snowball fight. Don't leave

these things lying around where others can get their

hands on them!

 

 You can see more of them here.

; )

http://www.realityzappers.com

 

 

I was pondering Christmas recently. The different traditions and how children of our global village manage to cope with clashes in basic systems of belief. For example, who really does bring the presents and when exactly?

Then a major supermarket chain here called Migros ran a Christmas campaign that tickled me to the tip of my toes.

They managed in one picture to capture what dear old Santa must feel each time he steers his reindeer over the border into Switzerland.

And what’s that?

Total schizophrenia!

Why?

In the Migros image there’s this very silly Santa, standing in a snowy wasteland looking completely lost. He’s holding the reigns of a reindeer (not Rudolf’s!)  in one hand and in the other a huge shopping bag. There’s no sled in sight and Santa doesn’t look at all in the mood to say ‘hohoho’ instead he looks like he’s suffering severe concussion.

What’s really going on here?

 Is Santa looking for his sled? Or for Rudolf ?? Or for his way home?? Or, more likely, is he wondering what damage Migros has done to his wallet??

Was there a Rudolf-led mutiny? A twitch or glitch in the red-nosed radar equipment or did one of the back squad (Dancer or Prancer? Donner or Blitzen? ) accidentally kick Santa in the head and right off his sled mid flight?

I think Santa’s real problem in Switzerland is role confusion.

And the Migros pic captures poor Santa’s dilemma perfectly.

 I mean who really does bring the presents? And when exactly?

For English speaking kids, (and anyone exposed to Walt Disney or global marketing) it’s Santa and Rudolf, after smashing their sled on your roof in the early hours of Dec 25^th. Somehow these two mysteriously break into your house, usually by sliding down a nonexistent chimney. Then they drink what ever alcoholic beverage you leave them and gobble up whatever  cookies are left lying about . They also leave bags of their loot lying in your living room before disappearing, god-knows-how. ( The exact opposite to what most other break-and-enter teams do the rest of the 365 days, when they take most of your stuff away with them instead of bringing you more.)

In Switzerland actually it’s not Santa’s job to deliver presents.

 This is the job of ‘the Christ child’. And, in good Swiss tradition, he’s a day earlier than Santa. As for how he brings the loot into your living room? Well, he’s a chip off the old block. That’s God for you. Somehow the loot just materialises under all Christmas trees, in living rooms throughout the country on the eve of the 24^th. How’s that for a show of immaculate omnipotence?!

And what about Santa? Well he only gets a minor role on Dec 6^th as Sami Klaus. Poor Rudoph gets turned into a donkey on this day and there’s none of that wreckless red-nosed driving or flying through the sky silly season stuff. 

Actually for Swiss kids, Santa is a big bad guy who spends all year in the forest spying on you, to see if you’re doing your homework, tidying up your room or still peeing on the toilet seat, same as last year. He has a big book with everything written down in it and you have to say a little poem or sing something you’ve specially memorized before he hands over a bag of peanuts and wags his finger at you telling you to watch out, because he sees everything. None of this jolly ‘ho ho ho’ stuff. He’s a really serious guy. Most kids are terrified of him and rightly so. And maybe because he’s scared that grown up kids eventually figure out a way of getting their revenge, he’s always shadowed by a bodyguard called ‘Schmultzli’ instead of Rudolph. Actually, Schmultzli is probably the guy to blame for Santa knowing everything.

 Why? Because he’s covered in soot. Proof that he spent all year in your chimney spying on you and writing down all the worst things you’ve managed to accomplish  in Santa’s big ugly book.

And as for when Christmas actually takes place?

As usual, the Swiss are very particular about being extremely early. As a result, Christmas doesn’t even get celebrated on Christmas day but a few hours earlier, on Christmas eve!

 But wait. It get's even more bizarre.When most of the English world is just starting to think about the silly season, it’s already game over here.

None of that 12 days of Christmas, eleven-maids-a-milking and a partridge in a pear tree stuff. The Christmas season starts here a whole month earlier, with a 24 day Adventzkrans countdown. And each of the 4 Sundays leading up to Christmas is sacred.  On the first Advents Sunday you burn one candle, on the second two, on the third Sunday of December 3 candles get burnt and so on.   And just to prove a point about being so far ahead you actually forget the plot, Christmas day , the 25^th doesn’t even feature in their advents calenders!

You don’t believe me?! I'll post one here.

Hey, look what I found. One from Migros!!

: )

 Confused Santa, snow 'n all!!

  http://www.migros.ch/DE/Aktuelle_Angebote/Weihnachten_2008/Seiten/Adventskalender.aspx

So, how do kids cope with this cultural meltdown?

My son Jules wrote an essay at school last year that seemed to solve the problem perfectly.
Santa and the Christ child made a 'deal' when Santa's sled upturned.
The Chirst Child magicked all Santa's prezzies back into their sacks and back onto Santa's sled. In gratitude, Santa invited 'The Christ child' to move out of his barn and into Santa's big mansion at the North Pole.

Then, when Rudoph got a cold on the big day, the Christ Child pulled the sled on his behalf.

These days they all live togther happily in Santa's big mansion with all their merry elves and Rudolph is the Christ child's best friend. They often go flying together!
; )

Walt Disney move over!

I live in a very different place to where I grew up.

 

In Africa you put things in your fridge to cool them down.

Here, you put things in your fridge to stop them freezing!

 

I swear, it’s true! Take my groceries for example. I couldn’t find them this morning.

 

When I reached for the cream, it wasn’t there. Then I realised, oops, a whole bag of groceries must still be in my car.

And where’s my car? Buried under a mountain of snow!

 

I’m going to have to go out into the freezing cold and dig for it later, as soon as the sun comes up. If the sun comes up! You can’t take this sort of thing for granted here in Switzerland.  It’s quite possible that if you haven’t paid some premium or another your daylight could just get cancelled. I think it’s called ‘daylight saving’. Not quite sure how it works except that when I phone my friends back home in Africa they all seem to have gained an hour whereas I’ve lost one. Probably this has to do with one of the universal laws governing this planet,  called ‘the law of conservation’.

 

What does this law say? Nothing gets lost, it just gets given away to someone else, probably someone in Africa.

 

; )

Beside the fact that both are fat old men wearig  red satin, there's also this intriguiing piece of evidence:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

 

Hmmm??

I learnt that in Switzerland the Christ child is a girl!

I swear it’s true!

 Move over baby Jesus, here comes the feminine principle!

This is what a friend of mine told me about her:

"The Christ Child is sort of an angel or magic fairy, with sparkling,
silvery hair. If there is snow, you usually can see some of the hair,
hanging in the trees and bushes around the house, where the Christkindli
passed by - glittering in the sparkles of light which are falling out of
the window into the night. Most children have seen here - or at least -
ave just missed to see her when they where small. Nobody is interested
to know, how she comes in to the living room. She simply can do things
like that. She rings a bell, when she arrives but the moment you storm
in there - shes already gone, leaving the Christmas tree all shining
with candles. Yup. That's Christmas.

How come I’ve only noticed this after nearly 7 years of living here?

That’s my big ah-ha today.

If you come from a place of preconceived ideas you absolutely won’t see

what’s right under your nose.

I’ve had some pretty preconceived ideas about everything.

And now?

I’m changing absolutely everything.

 

My million dollar question for you:

What is right under your nose that you aren’t seeing

because it doesn’t fit your belief about how the world works?

 

May you love and be loved, fully, undeservedly and passionately
May you let go of the past, by embracing it.
May you cherish your time
May you have courage
May you have focus
May you connect with source
May you be lead though play
May you act on your intuition
May you speak your truth
May you surround yourself only with friends who embrace your highest vision of yourself.
May you commit fully
May you not hold back
May you never give up on yourself
May you cherish the sacred, in you, in others, in nature.
May you be both successful and happy, and not put off one for the other.
May you have both peace and prosperity, and not forfeit one for the other
May you be more gentle with yourself and others and have less rules.
May you honour your body, you spirit and your life purpose

In short:

May you choose heaven instead of hell, with every breath and every thought.

Wishing you a sacred time now with friends and family and in the coming year

Thought you might like this hot tip from my sister in-law
for passionate love in 2009. (It comes from Italy).

Someone needs to buy you sexy red underwear (bra and panties).
You can't buy them yourself.
Apparently Italian women do this for each other at Christmas time.

On 1 January you have to burn the panties to welcome in new passion
into your life!

If this tip gets to you too late........ there's always next year!
; )

I'm off to play now a few days.
Wishing you 365 days of playfulness,
Jena